So someone I know has written some 'erotic' stories

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by King Prawn, Jul 25, 2008.

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  1. King Prawn Shaft Master

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    King Prawn, Jul 25, 2008
    #1

  2. Overtone .

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    writted
    Overtone, Jul 25, 2008
    #2

  3. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

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    writted
    Uncle Damfee, Jul 25, 2008
    #3

  4. Eric Cioe Junior Member

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    You ought to quote it to her next time you see her.
    Eric Cioe, Jul 25, 2008
    #4

  5. Overtone .

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    Writing (writting?) in that tense is so annoying. "the black mesh string that would be my underwear" She's fucking terrible!
    Overtone, Jul 25, 2008
    #5

  6. Overtone .

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    "The grinding of our bodies turn me up to eleven. With eyes closed, we continue the sexual act"

    Seriously? The sexual act? These bodies go up to eleven?
    Overtone, Jul 25, 2008
    #6

  7. hubble telescope

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    Delightfully Bad.
    hubble, Jul 25, 2008
    #7

  8. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

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    boy, are these are awkward to read
    Uncle Damfee, Jul 25, 2008
    #8

  9. King Prawn Shaft Master

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    Come to think of it, what makes a good erotic story?
    King Prawn, Jul 25, 2008
    #9

  10. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

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    ones that involve you and me
    Uncle Damfee, Jul 25, 2008
    #10

  11. wogbog og og

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    that makes her stories amazing


    amazing
    wogbog, Jul 25, 2008
    #11

  12. cheddar Wears a $6300 suit

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    Amazing
    cheddar, Jul 25, 2008
    #12

  13. Beautiful-Midnight Junior Member

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    :lol
    Beautiful-Midnight, Jul 25, 2008
    #13

  14. Rochallor Sir Trent of Reznor

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    That's the weirdest-ass POV I've seen. It's like a song written in 5/3 or something.
    Rochallor, Jul 25, 2008
    #14

  15. Andres not fucking around

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    Andres, Jul 25, 2008
    #15

  16. cheddar Wears a $6300 suit

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    He does all that while grabbing his towel? What a champ.

    She uses that kind of construction ALL THE TIME, it gets really fucking irritating after a while.

    Reading this story, I get annoyed at the writing style. Closing the firefox window, I scratch my balls.
    cheddar, Jul 25, 2008
    #16

  17. King Prawn Shaft Master

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    King Prawn, Jul 25, 2008
    #17

  18. Andres not fucking around

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    Andres, Jul 25, 2008
    #18

  19. devronius Everyone's Grudge

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    :lol Amazing. These erotic stories go up to eleven.

    :rollin
    devronius, Jul 25, 2008
    #19

  20. Andres not fucking around

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    [IMG]
    Andres, Jul 25, 2008
    #20

  21. King Prawn Shaft Master

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    Wonder how long it'll be before a 5/8er masturbates over that picture now.
    Even ironically.
    King Prawn, Jul 25, 2008
    #21

  22. Uber Mega AND MY AXE

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    :o
    Uber Mega, Jul 25, 2008
    #22

  23. Yousie I'd like some pound cake

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    kill it with fire
    Yousie, Jul 25, 2008
    #23

  24. Cognacad Junior Member

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    amazing
    Cognacad, Jul 25, 2008
    #24

  25. poruvian Junior Member

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    holy shit I clicked one and randomly scrolled and the first words I saw were "open the lips of heaven" and I laughed so hard my spermcount went down by 30%.
    poruvian, Jul 25, 2008
    #25

  26. shapeup Junior Member

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    Somebody in my family writes erotic novels, although I've never actually read one.
    shapeup, Jul 25, 2008
    #26

  27. Paper Kites barev a svetla

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    Awesomely bad.
    Paper Kites, Jul 25, 2008
    #27

  28. Cognacad Junior Member

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    Dude.

    Rofl.
    Rofl.
    Cognacad, Jul 25, 2008
    #28

  29. Cheezinator That's why you're in my room tonight

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    Cheezinator, Jul 25, 2008
    #29

  30. moonmang Showers are rare.

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    I answered the door, half naked. There you were, wet and cold. Your shirt was unbuttoned and revealing. I looked at your chest.....



























































    [IMG]
    moonmang, Jul 25, 2008
    #30

  31. LilPop IDK LOL

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    I rofl heartily at cheddar's post as i quote it with no additions of my own.
    LilPop, Jul 25, 2008
    #31

  32. King Prawn Shaft Master

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    Surely you'd become aroused beforehand.
    Would suck if you had to come in order to become turned on.
    King Prawn, Jul 25, 2008
    #32

  33. Snakedragon Suit Up!

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    It's even more hilarious that I think she wrote these stories seriously




    :rollin :rollin
    Snakedragon, Jul 25, 2008
    #33

  34. Overtone .

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    Now show her this thread already.

    wait....

    Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 3 (3 members and 0 guests)
    Overtone+ Beautiful-Midnight Naughty


    beautiful midnight, or naughty?
    Overtone, Jul 25, 2008
    #34

  35. cheddar Wears a $6300 suit

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    If she registered, her first post would probably be:

    "Viewing this thread, the tear valves in my eyes go to eleven and I reach for my sleeping pills. Being a dumb whore, I kill myself"
    cheddar, Jul 25, 2008
    #35

  36. Ben we're not programs

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    This.
    Ben, Jul 25, 2008
    #36

  37. TheProfessionale Junior Penis

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    i got you covered (for irony sake)












































    this might be a while
    TheProfessionale, Jul 25, 2008
    #37

  38. Bacong well-together man

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    Cameron called Elnimio that day -- he was busy from a long day's work underneath the bridge they were constructing. He answered the phone with a grunt, the way most men do after working 12 hours in the hot Atlanta sun.

    "Hello," he said, with a sharp tone.

    "Hey...," Cameron coos, his voice dripping with desire.

    "Oh....hey, Cammy baby. I've been waiting to hear your voice all day...are you ready for me?" Elnimio asks.

    "Ready as I'll ever be, sweetheart. I've cooked you dinner, when are you coming home?" Cameron asks.

    "I'll be home soon. Christian Älvestam is signing autographs at Kids-R-Us, so I'm gonna swing by there before I come home, is that ok?"

    "Sure honey! Make sure to get him to sign my duvet cover."


    - 90 MINUTES LATER -

    Elnimio walks into the door of his Mansion. It's a work of art -- glass chandeliers, a beautiful stone fireplace, 2 indoor pools, a massive library with every book you can imagine...and of course Cameron. The love of Elnimio's life. They met one beautiful summer in Madrid, while both were vacationing. Cameron was walking down the street with a very large loaf of bread in his hand, while Elnimio, dreamer that he is, stumbled into Cameron, knocking the loaf of bread to the ground and ruining it.

    "Oh no! You've ruined my bread! Whatever will I do!" Cameron frantically shouted, his eyes darting around the crowded marketplace, as if looking for charity.

    "I'm so sorry. Here, let me buy you a new loaf, and a coffee." Elnimio says. "We can sit down and get out of this crazy marketplace."

    "Oh thank goodness, another soul who speaks english. I appreciate your gesture, I'd love to have coffee with you. I'm Cameron, I'm from America. What's your name?"

    "My name is Elnimio, I'm not from the USA, but I do live there. I work under bridges, but that's too long of a story. Shall we go now?"

    "I would be delighted!"

    Elnimio takes Cameron by the arm as they walk into the sunset, towards a small cafe. They sit down at the table, and shortly after a cute waiter gets their lattes.

    "So Cameron, what is it that you do?" Elnimio asks him, his eyes sharply focused on his face. Cameron had such a beautiful face, with such beautiful eyes. It almost seemed to Elnimio that Cameron's eyes contained the galaxy.

    "Well Elnimio, I have my own business. I sell and repair computers, it's something that I'd like to get out of but then again, it's something I'm good at and it pays the bills, you know? I'm just looking to do something I love." Cameron says, with disappointment on his face.

    "Yeah, I understand. My work as a Construction Worker -- well, I own the business but I work just as hard as anyone -- is good, I guess. I make spectacular money, but I'm just not as happy as I could possibly be. I think it's due to the fact that I don't have a wonderful person to share my life with." Elnimio says, with his eyes focusing in on Cameron's.

    “I agree. Life is much better when you have that special someone to share it with. It makes every day better, the sun shine brighter. I can’t wait until I meet that someone,” Cameron says. “Perhaps I have…” Cameron says, his voice trailing off, as he covers his face with his hand. “I’m sorry, I must go.”

    “WAIT!” Elnimio shouts, desperately. “Where are you staying? I want to see you tonight.”

    Cameron smiles delightfully, and extends his hand outwards to Elnimio. “Come with me, handsome.”

    The sex that followed that evening was the best sex of Elnimio’s life. It was intense, long lasting, and as passionate as any encounter he had ever experienced with another human, male or female. As they lay in bed afterwards, Elnimio surprised Cameron with a request.

    “Want to come and stay with me in America? We could get to know each other more, get to…explore each other more. I’ve never met someone as amazing as you, and I don’t want to let you go.”

    “That sounds wonderful, Elnimio, but it’s so soon. How do I know you won’t hurt me?” Cameron asks.

    “Well, we’ll do it this way. No strings attached. I’ll get you a hotel in the city, and you can come see me anytime you like. If you decide to leave, just leave. I will understand. Being the type of men we are is very difficult. I don’t want to scare you away, but I feel so intensely attracted to you that my body cannot resist.”

    “That’s very, very flattering. Let’s try it. But one thing, Elnimio?” Cameron asks.

    “Yes?”

    “I’ll pay for my own hotel.” Cameron flatly replies.

    “Ok, ok,” Elnimio laughs. “No need to get in a fit.”

    - PRESENT DAY -
    “Honey! You’re home! Quickly, come eat, I’ve just finished.” Cameron says with much excitement in his voice.”

    “Ok, ok. What are we having?” Elnimio asks.

    “Your favorite. Tacos. Dig in!” Cameron says.

    - LATER THAT EVENING -
    Cameron throws Elnimio onto the bed, ripping off his shirt and pants. He feverishly goes for Elnimio’s hard, pulsating Penis. Cameron puts it into his mouth and begins to massage it with his tongue. No pleasure is too great for the man of his dreams. Elnimio squeals with delight at the pleasurable feeling of a warm mouth on his penis. As Cameron continues to pleasure Elnimio, he readies himself to be penetrated by his man. He slides his pants and thong off, and presents his bare behind to Elnimio, who cannot resist. He thrusts hard and fast into Cameron’s behind, repeatedly slamming his Penis into him. Both men scream with delight as their animalistic desires are met. Elnimio comes -- once, twice, thrice. It’s Cameron’s turn. Cameron is considerably larger than Elnimio, so he goes into Elnimio’s behind very gently – he doesn’t want to hurt him. But soon enough, he is pounding away at his behind with a brutal force, so hard that Elnimio is screaming at the top of his lungs in ecstacy. Cameron orgasms multiple times as well – both men are exhausted from their act of love.

    As Cameron rolls off Elnimio onto the bed, he asks Cameron one question. “Do you even listen to technical music?”

    “Huh? No. Let’s get in the shower, baby.”
    Bacong, Jul 25, 2008
    #38

  39. TheProfessionale Junior Penis

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    TheProfessionale, Jul 25, 2008
    #39

  40. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

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    I...... I have no words



    none
    Uncle Damfee, Jul 25, 2008
    #40

  41. Andres not fucking around

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    Andres was walking. He saw the woman in the cold shiver. He stopped and sayed "Why you do that? Being out here in the cold."

    The stranger smiled and replied "I'm reading. Want to make love to my body?"

    "Yes please!"

    They held hands and walked together and went to Andres' apartment and went in to his bedroom. "You are the prettiest thing I have ever done seen!" Andres started to caress the porcelain face. She cooed loudly like a pigeon in heat. The clothes they were gone and the bed cushioned them."Hey you have a penis!" said he. She blurted out "Sorry, I forget." "Are you angry?"?

    "No, I've always wanted a brother"

    They began kissing hotly. The room was filled with "mmmm". Andres told his lover to grab on to the fan. The ladyman obliged and as suspected was light and agile like a feline. Each time she passed he thumb that ass. "Moaning moaning moaning". Andres was pushed backwards as he was pounced. They rolled onto the floor crunchily squishing cockroaches. This went on four hours. Until juices flew everywhere. Hearing a flapping Andres yelled "Quickly shut the blinds so that the stork cannot bless our union!!" Once again junglelike she sprang and shut them. "PHEW" they lay in the sweat.

    She looked at him softly "So much has happened. I need to dye my hair." She got up to leave. Andres cried "Wait! Your name?!"

    She smirked wildly and then jumped out the window. A card flew back in and landed on the floor. Andres picked it up and held it to his chest.

    "Syn: Your friendly douche."
    Andres, Jul 25, 2008
    #41

  42. wogbog og og

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    holy shit :lol

    “Come with me, handsome.â€
    wogbog, Jul 25, 2008
    #42

  43. Vibrating_Duck :duck

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    This quote made me lol when I read it, but in hindsight, it seems empty and hollow compared to the glory of bacong's post
    Vibrating_Duck, Jul 25, 2008
    #43

  44. Elii :3

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    holy fuck cameron
    Elii, Jul 25, 2008
    #44

  45. Scary Ed Don't tempt me Frodo

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    So there I was, in the warm, sensual room. My cock was as erect as I can remember it ever being, and I could feel the blood pulsing through my veins. A hand grasps my behind. I feel a cold, shiver down my spine. "Don't worry" a soft voice says, and the excitement draws more intense. I feel my pants pulled down and the soft, sensual hands of my partner gently grasping my underwear. Before I can turn around, I am naked from the waist down. My erection is throbbing, waiting......

    Suddenly, I feel a soft finger enter my buttocks. "Oooh, an experimenter" I thought to myself, "this could get kinky". The gentle caress of my partner's finger moves around sensually, causing pleasure I had never felt before. Somehow, I was enjoying this. I was REALLY enjoying this. "Almost done" the soft voice added, and I knew this was going to get good. I could feel the finger, deep inside my anus, touching my innards for the first time ever. It was amazing, like having a little pleasure fairy crawl inside me and have a seizure.

    "Alright" the voice came out with more intensity this time. "Your prostate is fine, you can pull up your pants now". So I thanked Dr. Kevin Sanders, and left. 'Twas the best sexual encounter I ever had.
    Scary Ed, Jul 25, 2008
    #45

  46. Sentient 7 Looking ass nigga

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    lol
    Sentient 7, Jul 25, 2008
    #46

  47. Cat tin heart

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    Awesome, I'm now a featured character in a piece of erotic fiction. I can die happy now.
    Cat, Jul 26, 2008
    #47

  48. chronowarp Changed man

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    Holy shit, I spat coke all over my keyboard.
    chronowarp, Jul 26, 2008
    #48

  49. edecoder Junior Member

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    "My name is Elnimio, I'm not from the USA, but I do live there. I work under bridges, but that's too long of a story."

    "Why you do that? Being out here in the cold."

    The stranger smiled and replied "I'm reading. Want to make love to my body?"

    "Yes please!"

    They held hands and walked together and went to Andres' apartment and went in to his bedroom. "You are the prettiest thing I have ever done seen!"

    I laughed pretty hard at these.
    edecoder, Jul 26, 2008
    #49

  50. King Prawn Shaft Master

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    Scary Ed destroyed me.
    King Prawn, Jul 26, 2008
    #50
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