Religious Facebook Statuses

Was it a powerpoint presentation of His word?

That's the way to Excel

LOL

irony level 99999

It's not satire, though... the guy is ultra-Christian (he's the same one that I posted before that said something about how religion is lies but Jesus and God are truth, or whatever). The only reason I have him on my facebook friends is that he's also a kickass photographer.

Poe level 99999

‎"I want the whole Christ for my Savior, the whole Bible for my book, the whole Church for my fellowship, and the whole world for my mission field." -John Wesley

I want the whole facebook for my ministry tool.

For this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another; not as Cain, who was of the evil one and slew his brother. And for what reason did he slay him? Because his deeds were evil, and his brother’s were righteous. Do not be surprised, brethren, if the world hates you. (1 John 3:11-13) - These verses speak a lot about the tension that exists today between the world and Christians. The world hates us because we try to live righteously and preach the truth.

FUCK

I do not even

that picture made me cry bald eagles

G_d is such a smug asshole.

That guy is seriously close to rocking a Hitler stache.

wat

kim bum? i can't even describe how much i fail completely at understanding what the fuck is going on in the above image

does that say satanas

does that say counter stike

‎"Jesus take the wheel day"... Please can some of my christian friends post some bible stuff on that page because it's really dumb... The concept is dumb... and it puts in danger what little religious freedom Christians truly have in America... Please God have mercy on the souls of people who actually get onto the highway and let go of the wheel in an attempt to see how much Jesus loves them... i too have done some stupid things for the faith... But this takes it to the next level...

what

the

fuck

At the very least, we should follow Christ because He has all authority over Heaven and Earth. What a blessing, therefore, that His ways ARE righteous (not self-righteous) and good-that in serving Him all our needs are met. If we disagree with His worldview, then it is not because He is wrong, but because we are. (Psalm 119:89-91).

My brother's religious fb statuses are pretty awesome imo (I'm a former xian btw)

Jesus was never afraid of being misjudged by others because he already knew who he was.

Asking God what to do in every situation is called control (and he doesn't want it). Never talking about decisions with God is called independence (and it's an illusion). Conversing with God about things that matter to his heart is called relationship (and it's lots of fun).

I quit asking, "what would Jesus do?" Instead I ask, "what is Jesus doing?" The former reduces walking in the Spirit to morality, but the latter recognizes God's present reality.

yeah, but has jesus really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

He's on the right track, he might even reject all Christianity in a few years.

having conversations with your own superego is so fun

I AM SO EXCITED TODAY. WAS GOING THRU A CRISIS AND I SPOKE TO GOD AND REMINDED HIM OF MY FAITHFULNESS AND THAT I NEEDED HIS FAVOUR ASAP AND HE SHOWED UP AND SHOWED OUT AND GAVE ME MORE THAN I ASKED FOR. THANK YOU LORD. FAITHFULNESS=FAVOUR

sometimes god just needs a little reminder

I no longer have FB, but some of you should start other dangerous tests of faith days for religious people to pass around.

AUGUST 5TH IS FRY FOR FAITH DAY! RECONFIRM WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW BY SITTING IN A BATH TUB WITH A HAIR DRYER. SHOW THESE ATHEISTS WHAT FAITH CAN OVERCOME!

We get it, you don't have facebook anymore

How about we just build faith-powered aircraft, load them up with religious zealots praying for lift, and roll them off a cliff.

makes sense

let your inner terrorist out

when some girl starts talking about animal shit, the last thought that would occur to me is "huh, she's pretty intelligent"

Yet another sign that atheism makes you stupider!!! Check mate atheists

This might be the best thread on 5/8.

If threads are rated by how much they make me rage, this is up there with the Female Facebook Statuses thread

i like how apparently all atheists ever want to do is talk about how there is no god, even with little girls

this is the worst one yet

don't you know that atheists have no other interests but the lack of god

They also smile smugly. What more proof is needed that they are wrong?

I bet the little girl wouldn't know about animal shit if it wasn't for her See 'n' Say: Poo Edition.

You guys are the worst. Militant atheists are worse than militant religious types.

Make an atheist facebook status thread, nuts on the road, bro.

Whisky and Devotions: the greatest combination ever.