Me: God, can I ask You a question? God: Sure Me: Promise You won't get mad ... God: I promise ... Me: Why did You let so much stuff happen to me today? God: What do u mean? Me: Well, I woke up late God: Yes Me: My car took forever to start God: Okay Me: at lunch they made my sandwich wrong & I had to wait God: Huummm Me: On the way home, my phone went DEAD, just as I picked up a call God: All right Me: And on top of it all off, when I got home ~I just want to soak my feet in my new foot massager & relax. BUT it wouldn't work!!! Nothing went right today! Why did You do that? God: Let me see, the death angel was at your bed this morning & I had to send one of My Angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that Me (humbled OH GOD: I didn't let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that would have hit you if you were on the road. Me: (ashamed) God: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick & I didn't want you to catch what they have, I knew you couldn't afford to miss work. Me (embarrassedOkay God: Your phone went dead bcuz the person that was calling was going to give false witness about what you said on that call, I didn't even let you talk to them so you would be covered. Me (softly I see God God: Oh and that foot massager, it had a shortage that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn't think you wanted to be in the dark. Me: I'm Sorry God God: Don't be sorry, just learn to Trust Me.... in All things , the Good & the bad. Me: I will trust You. God: And don't doubt that My plan for your day is Always Better than your plan. Me: I won't God. And let me just tell you God, Thank You for Everything today. God: You're welcome child. It was just another day being your God and I Love looking after My Children... REPOST if you Believe in HIM
someone posted a quote from their prof (probably some bio class): Prof: Erectile dysfunction is endothelial dysfunction that manifests itself in a very unfortunate way. Since we're out of time, I'll leave you hanging until Monday.
The height of Evolution is when; Oral Sex becomes as complimentary as Costco food samplers. I should be a fucking Scientist.
Has a wie lil lie in and now has not even had time to do his hair today!!!.... Epic diva fail.... xXx whoop whoop xXx
Me: God, why did you let my mom get killed by a drunk driver, though? God: Your mother was a stupid cunt. Me: (Humbled) Oh
OMG SOOOOO DRUNK DSTILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!111 AND CANT BELIEVE WINE BOTS RTHTS TURN INTO GLASSES!!!! HOW WILL I MAK IT TO SIANSBURYS BEFORE FIBVE!!! CURRENTLY SDTILL STUCK TO THE FLOOOR!!!!! AND TRAGIC"11!! TRAAAGGGIIICCCCCCC LOL ...... NO SALAD FOR NEILY!!!!!andOOOOOOOOOO..........MMMMMMMMMMMM..............GGGGGGGGGGGG MY EYES ARE ST6UVCK UO MY TANNED SHOULDER OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG WHT AM I TANNWS
I hate bad ass kids went to the store today to get some ice cream. This little boy is in the chip section cuttin up cuz he can't have no candy so his mother say's no you can't have any till later so the little boy call her a stupid bitch & say that why my daddy left you ain't that crazy fb my mom would have beatin the hell out of me then killed me lol!!
watching an animaniacs doctumentry and realizing there was more effort and intelligence put in to an early 90s cartoon then there is in a movie made in 2012 are we getting dumber as a whole or what
Homeland Security test: Keywords: Osama, Bin Laded, Bomb, Women are less than men, Big boom then die. Dear Homeland Security, if you have found me, I am just practicing my freedom of speech and I pay my taxes every year.
