Male Facebook Statuses

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by CoyoteStarfish, Jan 31, 2011.

  1. Steve Johnson I like pelicans

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2007
    Message Count:
    1,540
    Location:
    Western Australia
  2. Dignan expert

    Member Since:
    Apr 27, 2007
    Message Count:
    10,000
    oh my god
  3. Lashie Esther Coleman

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2005
    Message Count:
    18,541
    Location:
    Perth, Western Australia
    Those who could relate, know the world aint cake
  4. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2004
    Message Count:
    48,639
    Location:
    Atlantis
    Lil wayne iz a guy of many thingz he singz he freestyle dam wayne u rock those who say wayne is gay dy a dreaming wayne got a daughter nd a son he is a father and a rappes we a waitng 4 yr new outcome album dam i am da best fan alive here at esikhawini ds guy rock if u dnt knw wayne u dnt knw hip hop ds guy got talent he sing hip hop he sing rock ds guy rock i wish 2 knw hw many chkz ds dude have big up 2 wayne
    Kurwa, Liv, Genomer and 9 others like this.
  5. Mr. Saint protomusics

    Member Since:
    Dec 6, 2006
    Message Count:
    8,030
    Location:
    Highland
    What the fuck is wrong with this world?
  6. Something Wicked Loverboy

    Member Since:
    Oct 27, 2008
    Message Count:
    9,701
    pimp b
  7. Mr. Saint protomusics

    Member Since:
    Dec 6, 2006
    Message Count:
    8,030
    Location:
    Highland
    no Lil Wayne
    Kurwa, cheddar and Lashie like this.
  8. Gadough Junior Member

    Member Since:
    Dec 15, 2011
    Message Count:
    435
    i make them good girls go bad and them bad girls go rachat
    cheddar, Damien Slade and Talon like this.
  9. Infernal_Goose Junior Member

    Member Since:
    May 10, 2009
    Message Count:
    4,457
    Location:
    BJ
    ...what the FUCK does rachat mean?
  10. Lashie Esther Coleman

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2005
    Message Count:
    18,541
    Location:
    Perth, Western Australia
  11. Lashie Esther Coleman

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2005
    Message Count:
    18,541
    Location:
    Perth, Western Australia
    real badman Yardie FT Tugz track off the mixtape: it's minus a Tugz Producky.
    this choone wud mash up di dance if it got played..real talk
  12. wogbog og og

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2008
    Message Count:
    14,376
    Location:
    victoria, canada
    wretched?
  13. Damien Slade Pee in my mouth

    Member Since:
    Jul 14, 2007
    Message Count:
    2,900
    man

    so true
    Jamesman likes this.
  14. Gadough Junior Member

    Member Since:
    Dec 15, 2011
    Message Count:
    435
    Nah nigga, it mean make the bitches go crazy. Most likely horny as well. I dunno.
  15. Lashie Esther Coleman

    Member Since:
    Mar 15, 2005
    Message Count:
    18,541
    Location:
    Perth, Western Australia
    ‎"Everyday can be pancake day, go to the shops and buy some egg flour and all the other shit to make a pancake u fat fuck"
    CatsMilk, cheddar and LilPop like this.
  16. LilPop IDK LOL

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2007
    Message Count:
    8,645
    Location:
    Toronto, Ontario
    Fuck off. Really? Fucking really? Get real, i refuse to pay 987 dollars to register my car.
    bradar likes this.
  17. Talon mesopotato

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Message Count:
    27,267
    987

    three digits on the common computer keyboard
  18. shapeup Member

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Message Count:
    7,885
    s'harder than a mutherfucka to pay for



































    [IMG]
    The Neat likes this.
  19. Steve Johnson I like pelicans

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2007
    Message Count:
    1,540
    Location:
    Western Australia
    Hasn't quite mastered that Shift-4 thing yet.
  20. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2004
    Message Count:
    48,639
    Location:
    Atlantis
    Jesus Culture concert tickets came in the mail! #excited
    toothy and bradar like this.
  21. toothy Forever Gold

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Message Count:
    14,694
    Location:
    These Villages
    In Season Two of the Big Bang Theory, Penny drives a 1985-1989 VW Jetta. Sheldon quips while riding in said car that her check engine light is on. First off, they didn't have check engine lights. They had an Oil Pressure light (accompanied by an annoying buzzer), Low Voltage light, Low Coolant light, High Beam light, and Four Way light. None of which would allow you to drive the car for a month without a hiccup. Unless the sensors were faulty. Morons.
    cheddar, bradar, CatsMilk and 3 others like this.
  22. Talon mesopotato

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Message Count:
    27,267
    sounds like the kind of joke they'd write for Big Bang Theory
    CatsMilk, Zorbo and toothy like this.
  23. Stubb Junior Member

    Member Since:
    Nov 9, 2006
    Message Count:
    7,831
    Location:
    Missoula, MT
    HA HA HA HA HA


    That's a laugh track.
    cheddar and toothy like this.
  24. Steve Johnson I like pelicans

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2007
    Message Count:
    1,540
    Location:
    Western Australia
    ooks:

    []10%-you need surgery
    []20%-you hurt my eyes
    []30%-fugly
    []40%-eww
    [x]50%-not bad
    [x]60%-ur alright
    ... []70%-ur pretty,good looking
    []80%-hot
    ... []90%-gorgeous
    []100%-sexy

    You r my:

    [x?]friend
    [] bestfriend
    []enemy
    []ex
    []girlfriend/boyfriend
    []relative

    If you stayed the night I would:

    []give you half of my bed
    [x]make you sleep on the floor
    []give you my bed and i would sleep on the floor

    If you kiss me i would be:

    [x]well,thats awkward
    []stare at you and be like WTF?
    []i dont know
    []kiss you back
    []slap you
    []punch you in the face
    []smile

    You should:

    []inbox me
    []text me
    []hug me
    []talk to me
    [x]Put this at your status so i can like it!♥
    Lashie likes this.
  25. Dignan expert

    Member Since:
    Apr 27, 2007
    Message Count:
    10,000
  26. Talon mesopotato

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Message Count:
    27,267
    but i have midterms :-X
  27. LilPop IDK LOL

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2007
    Message Count:
    8,645
    Location:
    Toronto, Ontario
    Don't invest emotions into friendships, don't invest time into people, and don't rely on friends. Friends are for ____? Yea I don't have friends just a lot of people I kind of know

    Flows, Oz's, Clothes, Hoes

    My left overs been around the block



    “You gotta seize life. Do something, man, just do something that matters. Squeeze the fuck outta every day. Life’s all sewn up. Everything’s in its right place, charged, ready. Whatever happened to all the heroes, man? I’m the last one. You hear me? Last one."
    [IMG]
    Liv, Talon and toothy like this.
  28. toothy Forever Gold

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Message Count:
    14,694
    Location:
    These Villages
    "Don't invest emotions into friendships, don't invest time into people, and don't rely on friends. Friends are for ____? Yea I don't have friends just a lot of people I kind of know""
    ouch. dude doesn't know how to open up to people, or deal with disappointment, or something. sad.
    Lashie likes this.
  29. Zorbo what

    Member Since:
    Oct 10, 2005
    Message Count:
    26,327
    Location:
    Sunshine Coast, QLD, Australia
    forever beta
    Spoonman likes this.
  30. toothy Forever Gold

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Message Count:
    14,694
    Location:
    These Villages
    ART STUDENTS IN AMERICA Untitled.png
    Talon likes this.
  31. toothy Forever Gold

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Message Count:
    14,694
    Location:
    These Villages
    dammit i could draw that shit in elementary school.
  32. Uncle Damfee Swaggot

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2004
    Message Count:
    48,639
    Location:
    Atlantis
    Jesus, that's awful
  33. toothy Forever Gold

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Message Count:
    14,694
    Location:
    These Villages
    looks like album art for one of the shitty tech death bands you like :rollin
    The Neat, King Prawn, cheddar and 4 others like this.
  34. Aäck each time u kill a kitten

    Member Since:
    Nov 7, 2006
    Message Count:
    6,449
    Location:
    Toe-kee-yo
    I just Taken a shit.. feels so dam good!! Goddam!!!! :)
    Talon likes this.
  35. PIMP B GET SILLY

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2007
    Message Count:
    22,911
    Location:
    Austin, TX
    Remember when Bobby Boucher showed up at halftime and the Mud Dogs won the Bourbon Bowl?
  36. lalakekela xoxo

    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2011
    Message Count:
    1,994
    Location:
    Earth
    Let's start a prayer avalanche: We all need prayers right now... If I don't see your name, I'll understand. May I ask my "FB Family" wherever you may be to kindly copy, paste and share this status for one hour to give a prayer of support to all those who have family problems, health, struggles ...and worries and just ...need... to know that someone cares. Do it for all of us for no-one is immune. I hope to see this on the walls of all my friends just for moral support. I know some will!! I did it for a friend and you can too. Share some faith and love to those in need. God works in mysterious ways! Better days to come in 2012. ♥ U all!!!
    Talon likes this.
  37. Gadough Junior Member

    Member Since:
    Dec 15, 2011
    Message Count:
    435
    Who the hell you been seein and who tha hell wrote this. I love the rush i felt when we make love, baby youre all that i been thinkin of for everything iwanted in my life. Man those words cut like a knife. So i promised myself even if it takes forever im guna find the man who wrote this letter. She grabed that letter from my hand and told me thru her tears, youre right i love this man. Ive carried this for years. Back when we put more into love than fighting. Thats when i lookd down like a fool.. And recognized my writing...
    bradar and Talon like this.
  38. Aäck each time u kill a kitten

    Member Since:
    Nov 7, 2006
    Message Count:
    6,449
    Location:
    Toe-kee-yo
  39. lalakekela xoxo

    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2011
    Message Count:
    1,994
    Location:
    Earth
    ‎!!!!2012 when we don't follow the ying and yang it also destroy's the weather patterns and causes old age!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WARNING


    ‎!!!!!!!!!2012!!!!!!!!!

    When we don't go by the ying and yang it causes the body to non function properly. Incest is the root of all diseases. Aids cancer std's famine homosexuality etc...........,


    The Black plaque started to spread all over europe Until it reached sicily which was the end of European and the Egyptians mated with the sicilians and that created balance which ended the black plaque. Check mate!!!!!!!!!!


    ‎!!!!!2012!!!! We live in a world where people think that incest is true love.


    Sexual intercourse makes up for the words you can't verbally express.
    CatsMilk, The Neat, cheddar and 3 others like this.
  40. Steve Johnson I like pelicans

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2007
    Message Count:
    1,540
    Location:
    Western Australia
    Fuck.
    The Neat and Eric Cioe like this.
  41. Talon mesopotato

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Message Count:
    27,267
    yes, i think that's what she's talking about :hm
  42. Infernal_Goose Junior Member

    Member Since:
    May 10, 2009
    Message Count:
    4,457
    Location:
    BJ
  43. Something Wicked Loverboy

    Member Since:
    Oct 27, 2008
    Message Count:
    9,701
  44. Al The Killer Junior Member

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2012
    Message Count:
    18
    Its really hard to find a guy these days that will treat a girl right. One that's not afraid to show his girlfriend off to his friends. A guy that doesn't want sex all the time. One that won't let drama and other girls get in the way. That's all every girl wants but can never find.... but.. we are out out there.... that's a promise.
  45. Kimberlyand oh, okay.

    Member Since:
    Jul 2, 2003
    Message Count:
    6,960
    Location:
    Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
    What's wrong with sex all the time?
    Lashie and wogbog like this.
  46. Kimberlyand oh, okay.

    Member Since:
    Jul 2, 2003
    Message Count:
    6,960
    Location:
    Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
    Translation: I have a small penis.
    Infernal_Goose likes this.
  47. Something Wicked Loverboy

    Member Since:
    Oct 27, 2008
    Message Count:
    9,701
    Kimberlyand, I care about what you say and not about your vagina.

    ...

    Now will you fuck me?
  48. bradar Perfect, and relevant

    Member Since:
    Apr 10, 2005
    Message Count:
    22,778
    Location:
    Brisbane, QLD, Australia
    If I were you, I'd fuck him.
    toothy likes this.
  49. Al The Killer Junior Member

    Member Since:
    Feb 26, 2012
    Message Count:
    18
    Because if a guy wants sex all the time, he is a sexual deviant who sees woman as objects.
  50. King Prawn Shaft Masterpiece

    Member Since:
    Jun 1, 2004
    Message Count:
    14,342
    Location:
    Глазго, Шотландия
    So my boyfriend tells me " that girl ur on the sofa wiv.... She rejected me now I'm wiv u" lol hillairious lol xXx
    Grack, The Neat, toothy and 5 others like this.